I loved this. So relevant - everyone is obsessed with snacking and it drives me mad, pre school and nursery, if you go out and about parents always have snacks available. I felt like a terrible parent with my first as she wasn’t a great eater so I tried not to fill her with snacks (bf too). My second now is obsessed with snacks and we’ve had to change our diet (no crisps etc) but she waits until we meet her friends and then eats theirs! We do eat a lot of fruit I feel like it’s a bit late to not do that but some great ideas here.
The other obsession that I feel is unnecessary is the have a drink after 5 mins of exercise that we now have. I dont feel that our body needs that unless it’s incredibly hot.
I’d also be interested in your thoughts about mealtimes because three times a day does not work for us and I’ve always wondered what’s more natural.
Totally agree! My three year old talks about 'hydration' from nursery! But I think it's another part of how our culture teaches us to place more reliance on experts rather than listening to our own.
My ideal mealtimes are a late breakfast and fairly early dinner, but then that does vary - sometimes I'm hungry in the morning. Now that I very rarely eat added sugar, I notice the appetite stimulation I get if I do - there's a particular sort of desperate morning hunger the day after.
In terms of what's natural - that depends enormously on available food. Hunting large animals or fish - occasional large meals and supplementing between times. Stuff to eat cooked but little firewood - intermittent meals. Stuff to eat raw - more frequent small meals. And then it's also likely to differ with the size of group that's sharing the food and the number of people collecting and preparing it. Meals certainly exist, but a set three meals a day seems to have come from industrialisation, productivity, and the military.
Such a helpful reminder. Kids are often not snacking for fuel, but for feeling and entertainment. And when every snack are highly palatable and ultra-processed, it rewires their sense of fullness and satisfaction (and makes it less likely for them to like whole nutritious foods). Keeping snacks simple (and just tasty enough) helps preserve natural hunger cues and mealtime sanity.
I remember the sheer obsession with feeding food to babies in my first mother’s group. What foods? When? Snacks? Feeding devices? Salt and spices or bland? I was the most relaxed one there. I let my daughter eat when she was hungry. Young children can tell you that and usually it was whatever we were eating at the time. They were shocked that I would hand her a half-peeled banana at 8 months and she’d happily sit and devour it. Why the heck would I mash it? She can do that herself! She’s a good eater and aside from difficulties tolerating gluten, eats a varied diet and willing to try new things.
In caloric abundance that we have, food has become another thing to “do” to your child. As I keep reminding mine, you ‘get to eat’. A normal kid will eat when they’re hungry and it will vary depending on their growth spurts. I would have loved to have kept breastfeeding mine into age 2, but I fell pregnant between 12 and 14 months later and they did not like the changes that it brought and lost interest at the end of my first trimester. The longest I’ve managed is 16 months. We’ll see how we go with the fourth baby.
This is such a great comment to read - thank you for sharing! Love the 'get to eat' perspective as well.
I had really strong breastfeeding aversion when nursing my older child when I got pregnant. I'd intended to breastfeed through but I had these really savage thoughts about her when she was feeding and we had to stop. I wish I hadn't, in hindsight, because she has oral motor problems and she could really have done with longer to strengthen her jaws, but it wasn't to be. :)
The thing to keep in mind is that fruit is a dessert. Any fruit in a standard grocery store is the result of hundreds, if not thousands, of years of selective breeding to be bigger and sweeter than the fruit of the precursor species. Humans don't evolve to better eat our food; we forcibly evolve our food to make it better to eat.
Fruit is fine - it's nature's treat. And yes, most of the varieties we eat have been selected to be bigger and sweeter, but even so, the evidence suggests that moderate fruit consumption is good for you.
I don't tend to give fruit as snacks because I want to have it as a treat (snacks - something that happens most days, treat - something that happens as a celebration). The reason for this is that by limiting fruit availability, you make it much more rewarding for your child. The net effect of this is that children become very motivated to seek it (increasing the effort they'll put in). Mine (aged 7 and 5) spend their pocket money on it. I'd much rather that they get that degree of reward from fruit rather than something ultraprocessed.
My son was at an after-school club the other week, and the teacher said "If you had £3000, what would you spend it on?" And he said, without pausing to think, "FRUIT!" That's the effect of making fruit less available! :D
This was another great article! One that a was actually able to apply to my daily life immediately- as my children are now 7&10 they’re beyond the pregnancy and breastfeeding stage so I can’t apply any of that advice anymore. Anyways, I have an apple tree, raspberry hedge, red currants, blueberries, blackberries and rhubarb and vegetable garden at home . So I’ve been telling my kids to eat those things first, and it works. Yesterday my daughter ate 2 very sour not yet ripe apples for dessert. We have a bowl of berries in the fridge…,
That sounds amazing! Your children are very lucky. :) At the moment, mine love to pick the berries the day before and freeze them and eat them straight from the freezer. Apparently sour crunchy frozen gooseberries are delicious! :D
I love this. It came during a time of stress induced by my baby dropping from the 10th percentile to 3rd percentile on the WHO growth chart. I've come to realize the weight charts don't account for babies who still breast feed on demand at 18+ months and I've tried not to let it stress me. The info in your article is very comforting and may help me not worry so much about all the snacks I'm supposed to give my baby which really went against my gut instinct. Thank you for promoting letting children stay aware of their bodily sensations like hunger.
I'm sorry - that does sound really stressful. A friend of mine is in a similar situation with a child who was born very premature. She's now five, and my friend is under pressure to feed her Oreo milkshakes (yes, those are exactly how they sound) to make her gain weight. But she is aware of the metabolic problems that smaller babies are at risk of, and doesn't want her to gain the weight in a way that compounds those. It's such a difficult place to be.
Obviously (you definitely know this, but I need to make sure it's clear to others reading this!) babies older than six months need a wider variety of nutrients than breastmilk can provide, so it's important to make sure that they have these available. Breastfeeding just before a meal, for example, will suppress their motivation to eat solid foods, so there is a timing question that can ensure that they use their hunger to motivate them to eat a wider variety of solid foods. :)
I'm glad you mentioned the timing, as it's been the most difficult to navigate and one of my greatest lessons in saying no! The timing aspect made us realize it wasn't WHAT we were feeding our 1.5 year old, rather it was WHEN. I can see the slippery slope (and nearly found myself sliding down it) of wanting your kid to gain weight so bad, you'll feed them whatever they'll eat and believe you've solved the weight problem. He loves strawberries and raspberries and mandarins but those can't be his main sources of nutrients.
What about sausage? I had a difficult time getting my kids when they were little to eat meat, but I could get them to eat sausages. The chicken apple ones from Costco in particular
Yeah - the timing piece can easily get in the way! I've also seen difficulties that children have faced when they don't eat much food and then fill up with lots of cows milk or formula. And so true about the wanting them to gain weight and then being pleased that they eat something. It feels right in the short term but then can be really difficult to resolve in the long term...
I loved this. So relevant - everyone is obsessed with snacking and it drives me mad, pre school and nursery, if you go out and about parents always have snacks available. I felt like a terrible parent with my first as she wasn’t a great eater so I tried not to fill her with snacks (bf too). My second now is obsessed with snacks and we’ve had to change our diet (no crisps etc) but she waits until we meet her friends and then eats theirs! We do eat a lot of fruit I feel like it’s a bit late to not do that but some great ideas here.
The other obsession that I feel is unnecessary is the have a drink after 5 mins of exercise that we now have. I dont feel that our body needs that unless it’s incredibly hot.
I’d also be interested in your thoughts about mealtimes because three times a day does not work for us and I’ve always wondered what’s more natural.
Totally agree! My three year old talks about 'hydration' from nursery! But I think it's another part of how our culture teaches us to place more reliance on experts rather than listening to our own.
My ideal mealtimes are a late breakfast and fairly early dinner, but then that does vary - sometimes I'm hungry in the morning. Now that I very rarely eat added sugar, I notice the appetite stimulation I get if I do - there's a particular sort of desperate morning hunger the day after.
In terms of what's natural - that depends enormously on available food. Hunting large animals or fish - occasional large meals and supplementing between times. Stuff to eat cooked but little firewood - intermittent meals. Stuff to eat raw - more frequent small meals. And then it's also likely to differ with the size of group that's sharing the food and the number of people collecting and preparing it. Meals certainly exist, but a set three meals a day seems to have come from industrialisation, productivity, and the military.
Hope that helps!
Such a helpful reminder. Kids are often not snacking for fuel, but for feeling and entertainment. And when every snack are highly palatable and ultra-processed, it rewires their sense of fullness and satisfaction (and makes it less likely for them to like whole nutritious foods). Keeping snacks simple (and just tasty enough) helps preserve natural hunger cues and mealtime sanity.
Couldn't have put it better myself. :)
I remember the sheer obsession with feeding food to babies in my first mother’s group. What foods? When? Snacks? Feeding devices? Salt and spices or bland? I was the most relaxed one there. I let my daughter eat when she was hungry. Young children can tell you that and usually it was whatever we were eating at the time. They were shocked that I would hand her a half-peeled banana at 8 months and she’d happily sit and devour it. Why the heck would I mash it? She can do that herself! She’s a good eater and aside from difficulties tolerating gluten, eats a varied diet and willing to try new things.
In caloric abundance that we have, food has become another thing to “do” to your child. As I keep reminding mine, you ‘get to eat’. A normal kid will eat when they’re hungry and it will vary depending on their growth spurts. I would have loved to have kept breastfeeding mine into age 2, but I fell pregnant between 12 and 14 months later and they did not like the changes that it brought and lost interest at the end of my first trimester. The longest I’ve managed is 16 months. We’ll see how we go with the fourth baby.
This is such a great comment to read - thank you for sharing! Love the 'get to eat' perspective as well.
I had really strong breastfeeding aversion when nursing my older child when I got pregnant. I'd intended to breastfeed through but I had these really savage thoughts about her when she was feeding and we had to stop. I wish I hadn't, in hindsight, because she has oral motor problems and she could really have done with longer to strengthen her jaws, but it wasn't to be. :)
Great article as usual.
Is snacking on fruit that bad? I snack on fruit a lot myself and my baby seems to love fruit so far, we'll see how it will go once she's a toddler
The thing to keep in mind is that fruit is a dessert. Any fruit in a standard grocery store is the result of hundreds, if not thousands, of years of selective breeding to be bigger and sweeter than the fruit of the precursor species. Humans don't evolve to better eat our food; we forcibly evolve our food to make it better to eat.
Yet, fruit is very healthy
Fruit is fine - it's nature's treat. And yes, most of the varieties we eat have been selected to be bigger and sweeter, but even so, the evidence suggests that moderate fruit consumption is good for you.
I don't tend to give fruit as snacks because I want to have it as a treat (snacks - something that happens most days, treat - something that happens as a celebration). The reason for this is that by limiting fruit availability, you make it much more rewarding for your child. The net effect of this is that children become very motivated to seek it (increasing the effort they'll put in). Mine (aged 7 and 5) spend their pocket money on it. I'd much rather that they get that degree of reward from fruit rather than something ultraprocessed.
My son was at an after-school club the other week, and the teacher said "If you had £3000, what would you spend it on?" And he said, without pausing to think, "FRUIT!" That's the effect of making fruit less available! :D
This was another great article! One that a was actually able to apply to my daily life immediately- as my children are now 7&10 they’re beyond the pregnancy and breastfeeding stage so I can’t apply any of that advice anymore. Anyways, I have an apple tree, raspberry hedge, red currants, blueberries, blackberries and rhubarb and vegetable garden at home . So I’ve been telling my kids to eat those things first, and it works. Yesterday my daughter ate 2 very sour not yet ripe apples for dessert. We have a bowl of berries in the fridge…,
That sounds amazing! Your children are very lucky. :) At the moment, mine love to pick the berries the day before and freeze them and eat them straight from the freezer. Apparently sour crunchy frozen gooseberries are delicious! :D
I love this. It came during a time of stress induced by my baby dropping from the 10th percentile to 3rd percentile on the WHO growth chart. I've come to realize the weight charts don't account for babies who still breast feed on demand at 18+ months and I've tried not to let it stress me. The info in your article is very comforting and may help me not worry so much about all the snacks I'm supposed to give my baby which really went against my gut instinct. Thank you for promoting letting children stay aware of their bodily sensations like hunger.
I'm sorry - that does sound really stressful. A friend of mine is in a similar situation with a child who was born very premature. She's now five, and my friend is under pressure to feed her Oreo milkshakes (yes, those are exactly how they sound) to make her gain weight. But she is aware of the metabolic problems that smaller babies are at risk of, and doesn't want her to gain the weight in a way that compounds those. It's such a difficult place to be.
Obviously (you definitely know this, but I need to make sure it's clear to others reading this!) babies older than six months need a wider variety of nutrients than breastmilk can provide, so it's important to make sure that they have these available. Breastfeeding just before a meal, for example, will suppress their motivation to eat solid foods, so there is a timing question that can ensure that they use their hunger to motivate them to eat a wider variety of solid foods. :)
I'm glad you mentioned the timing, as it's been the most difficult to navigate and one of my greatest lessons in saying no! The timing aspect made us realize it wasn't WHAT we were feeding our 1.5 year old, rather it was WHEN. I can see the slippery slope (and nearly found myself sliding down it) of wanting your kid to gain weight so bad, you'll feed them whatever they'll eat and believe you've solved the weight problem. He loves strawberries and raspberries and mandarins but those can't be his main sources of nutrients.
What about sausage? I had a difficult time getting my kids when they were little to eat meat, but I could get them to eat sausages. The chicken apple ones from Costco in particular
He does indeed love sausage haha
Yeah - the timing piece can easily get in the way! I've also seen difficulties that children have faced when they don't eat much food and then fill up with lots of cows milk or formula. And so true about the wanting them to gain weight and then being pleased that they eat something. It feels right in the short term but then can be really difficult to resolve in the long term...
Thank you so much for sharing. :)
This is great and so encouraging. Eating good food at proper times is very possible! Thanks for this!